12 months of therapy

The truth about seeing A therapist 

 

With whatever goal we have in our life it takes commitment, determination, belief that it's possible and a change in lifestyle. 

 

Just like the fitness industry there are quick fix gimmicks in the personal development world and I have seen many of them, and they do not go to the root of what is really happening. This is why they work for a short time or don't work at all.

 

Here is how therapy is similar to having fitness goals and hiring a PT trainer. 

 

If we have gone for 10, 20, 30 plus years of living a certain way such as not moving, not eating well and using coping mechanisms to soothe our emotional state, there are consequences for living that way. Emotional, physical and relational. 

 

So we need to see what damage we have inflicted on ourselves and others, this is what a reality check is. This can feel quite confronting because we can feel shame for our past behaviour, so we try to distance ourselves from it as much as possible only for it to show up in leaky ways.

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Avoiding our feelings - leads to health problems, loneliness, emptiness, depression and anxiety 

 

Therapy is not about shaming you, it's about bringing in the shame or fear that you are avoiding to the surface, so that it can be seen, to be felt, to be processed and released. Then you start to nurture yourself back to a balanced, healthy and happy person. 

 

Is it easy? No 

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Is it the most challenging thing you do in your life? Yes 

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Is it worth it? Yes 

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Why is it worth it?

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• You are breaking generational trauma which means your children or the people around you will benefit from you doing this work too.

• You will see your worth and what you are really capable of in relationships, your career and your lifestyle.

• You will feel more confident to create the life you want and show the people around what is possible. 

• You will feel all range of emotions and understand what they're telling you and why we have emotions in the first place.

 

We need to go through it first to get to the other side. To build trust within ourselves that we will show up for ourselves. 

 

We avoid seeing the reality because of fear of feeling shame, the fear of what will I need to change, the fear that our insecure self tries to convince us that there is no hope.

 

• The fear or shame that arises in the body when we realise how we could have hurt people in our lives 

• The fear that we feel when we slow down and feel again and then repressed memories come to the surface. 

• The fear we feel when uncover how our upbringing impacts us today

• The stories the fear tells us, generally a voice telling you why you can't trust others and why you're a shit person. This voice is your protector. It's not accurate and if you listen to this voice it will crush your dreams and ability to change your life. It will sabotage healthy relationships too.

• This voice and the feelings will get loud during your change 

• The discomfort that has been suppressed with coping mechanisms will also get loud and uncomfortable in the body 

 

It is the very reason we change our mind, make up excuses or blame everything and everyone else for why we are the way we are. For why we don't get results.

 

So how is this similar to the gym or our fitness goals?

 

When you get real about your health goals you assess where you are now and where you want to be? During the measuring, weighing and food tracking stage we can often feel shame, embarrassment and regret. If we give up during that discomfort we will be back at where we started. 

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So let's say you move forward, you create a goal, a plan and then execute it with the support of a group or PT trainer that is safe, supportive and encouraging.  You make mistakes along the way and fall back into old habits but with the support of your emotional mature trainer you get back on track again and learn from your mistakes. 

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To get results you need to show up consistently and the longer you have neglected your health the longer, harder and more uncomfortable it will be to adopt this new way of being.

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Movement at first will feel uncomfortable, you may get injured, you may feel tired and exhausted and its not always pleasant. There are days where it feels good and days where it doesn't. Days where you want to give up and days where you celebrate yourself. 

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If this is the case then payoff of sticking to it will also be even more extraordinary.  

 

This is exactly the same for therapy. 

 

I had been avoiding myself up until I was in my early 30s so what price did I pay for this. 

I had a quarter life crisis. A career change where I have invested thousands of dollars into this change, trusting that my future will be more fulfilling and my finances will improve. The price at that point was time and financial. 

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Learning to be on my own without a partner (relationships were my coping mechanism). What an emotional rollercoaster that was. So many times where I have felt deeply lonely and dysregulated and choosing both healthy and unhealthy ways to regulate. Now I am mastering healthy ways to regulate and I am manifesting my life.

 

I have made plenty of mistakes along the way that have got me to where I am today. Moving through those mistakes is how I can deeply support my clients. Being able to feel shame and not allow it to rule my behaviour has helped me to stick to my goals and share my learnings with my friends and clients.

 

It has been the hardest thing I have done in my life and the most rewarding at the same time. 

 

So therapy is not a 1, 3 or 6 session fix. It's a lifestyle, an investment and the catalyst of creating the long term change in your life. 

 

This is why I have created a 12 Month therapy year. 

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ARE YOU READY TO COMMITT TO YOUR GROWTH, BUILD SELFTRUST AND BECOME CONFIDENT IN THE WAY YOU LIVE YOUR LIFE AND THE CHOICES YOU MAKE?